Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Healing comes through tears

My road home... beautiful.
As I've said many times, I'm not a religious person.  My journey in faith has taken many twists and turns.  But the past week has been all about reflection for me, and one of the things I've truly realized is how lucky I am to have such wonderful friends and family.

I had a chance to spend time with all of my cousins this week, every single one of them.  I saw all of my aunts and uncles.  I saw so many extended relatives and friends.  In my mind, I took a picture of them, these people who have been a part of my life.  When I last said goodbye to Grandma, I knew it might be our last hug.  I even have a picture from that moment... but sometimes I think we take for granted our time with people that we care about, because they have always been there.  We won't always have a picture to hold on to.

I also got a chance to spend some time with a few of my friends from high school, which is something I look forward to every time I come home.  I know I probably annoy them with my incessant chatter, but I feel like when I see them I don't ever have enough time, so I speak without even pause to breathe.  I hope they know it's how I show my love.  One of my dearest friends asked me how I was dealing with the loss of my Grandma, because he knew I'd struggled with depression in the past.  He was worried that I might slip back into that state again.  This, more than anything else this week, touched me.  To know that he was there for me, and so in tune to what I was going through, meant the entire world to me.

All of the love I've been feeling from friends and family both near and far has been tremendous.  It all makes me think about the song that my cousin AV sang at Grandma's funeral service, with a chorus that is everything I've been feeling for so long....

What if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights 
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise
(Laura Story)

Even if you're not religious, it's a beautiful song... because something in life we learn the most about ourselves, love, and other important things during the most difficult of times.

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